Starting this blog has been quite an interesting journey. I learn something new everyday and I have meet some extremely interesting people, people that I would consider friends. I love reading their blogs and reading ever tweet they post (some of you all talk a lot!). It got me thinking about how the roles of friendship really change through the years and our expectations and needs change right along with it.
As a child friendship was such an easy thing. It seemed wherever you were at the time you left with a handful of new friends. When you started Junior High, High School, and College the list just kept getting larger and larger. But then life happens… you get married, have kids, or move away and the list of friends that are right there seems to get smaller. Now don’t get me wrong the friends you had when you were growing up will always be your friends. You love keeping up on Facebook and calling once in awhile, but the relationships change. For me I moved from Alaska to Alabama so most of my old friends live too far away to see. I sometimes do envy the people who have lived in a city their whole lives and get to remain close to their childhood friends but not everyone can do that, so you start making friends that fit your life.
When you first get married you find other married friends, so you and your significant other can spend every waking second together, until you realize a) wow that is all we have in common with some of these people and b) this may be way too much time with your spouse. Then you have children and your friends become Moms that you meet at your child’s athletic matches or at school but most of these friends change with the weather or whenever you child decides to do something new (which for mine… all the time!) I am still friends with a lot of these moms but life seems to get in the way because we are all now in new situations and it was a lot easier to hang out when we were all forced to sit at the same field or gym for hours while our children practiced. Careers bring new friend your way but these can change as your job or their jobs change.
This brings me to what friendship means to me now. I spent a lot of time making friends to fit the needs of those around me and I am at a place in my life where I need to focus on me and what I need. Maybe it is selfish… but my daughter is 17 and on her last year of high school, she doesn’t care if I am friend with all of her friend’s parents and my husband doesn’t care if my friend has a husband he can hang out with. I am surrounding myself with people that “I” truly enjoy, people that make me laugh and I don’t wonder “now why do I hang out with these people again?”. I am rediscovering who I am as a person and filling it with people that are just awesome and worth spending time with!
Speaking of spending time with new friends… I went to lunch on Tuesday with some awesome ladies that I meet on Twitter and you really need to check them out, read their blogs and follow them on Twitter! Cynthia, Sherri, Rachel and Amber.